me_shill
@ hotmail.com
Name: Roshilla Binte Mohamad Jafri
Age: 16 Yrs Old
Gender:...Umm...I guess I'm Female??
Likes: Hmm...Innocence, purity, trust, peace,guys..
Dislikes: Liars, Backstabbers, Insecurities, bitches & Jerks, tappered ppl!!
School: Charlton Primary, Hougang Seconday School
Email:coolshilla@yahoo.com.sg OR me_shill@hotmail.com
Website: I have another webbie which PINS my thoughts at www.roshilla.blogspot.com
Well What can i say about myself? I am just a normal girl...Who has alot of confusion in her head. a person who like the rules that do apply. a person who is fill with a million contrdiction sometimes she make no sense. still wanna know me?
Friday, May 06, 2005
OMG! how long have i not been in here...it's unbelieveable. So much has happened and i am all depressed. i didn't even get to say how happy i was when i was with him. He's now avoiding me and i cannot do anything abt it. This is so unfair. Now he already broke up with me and i am all sad. Like hell. I really shouldn't have fall in love. I don't understand why i am the one punish and all. I hate myself now. I've wrote so much in my diary and wished he would understand! But he never will! Wish i could just make him understand that i am really lost without him. But I'll be strong and face the challenges all on my own!
But i know i am not alone... i still got friends i can rely on and turn to. I know for one fact that they have been there for me when i felt everybody left. I really cherished all my friends and i know i am blessed to have them in my life. This make me HAPPY! See how i am moving on???
Ok so let me not dwell on the pain i am feeling. So what has been going on? Well for me...i hope my dad suscribe that stupid internet thingy or i have to kill him! ha ha ha just joking. ok....i'll write more if i can...and tell u the whole story....see ya. PEACE!!
a penny for my thoughts?
Thursday, December 16, 2004
| It has been lonely since you left me
You left me for her It has been so cold since you left me You left me for her After you make me feel so loved Making me feel comfortable in my own skin It is as if I am the only one you had loved Making me feel as if I am your queen Why did you go? Why did you make this life meaningless? What did I do? Oh no…you’re making me skinless The sadness that one bare Is nothing to the one I am feeling The pain that can’t compare Is the pain I am dealing When my world comes burning down Before my eyes, I see you Now that you are gone I am lost, don’t know what to do Why did you read me so clearly? Why is it you I am falling for? The love I gave you, you remember vaguely Who are you feeling for? You gave me hope But now you screwed it up so royally The pain I will slowly cope How could you be so cruel to me? Right now, love defeated me But I will move on I will win love back slowly Hoping you will be gone Far away from my memory Far away from me. |
a penny for my thoughts?
Saturday, November 20, 2004
| I am young and free
Nobody’s holding me down But something got a hold of me Why am I feeling down? I see couples happily ever after I see family giving love to each other I see me, what am I after? Could love be my answer? Why am I so alone? How come this is happening to me? Am I losing something I own? How could this be possible, how could this be me? Feeling lost and feeling cold Nobody’s there to care Not feeling young but feeling old Where I could I run? Where? I am young and I am free But I want somebody to hold me Could you be the one I seek? I don’t know, I’m too weak… |
a penny for my thoughts?
Friday, November 19, 2004
| My life as a teenager was different from others. I couldn’t have anything I want, anytime I want them. Everything was difficult especially when my favorite uncle went to court for a case he was involved. A case that involved drugs. I was shocked when I heard that news. My uncle wouldn’t do that! I thought. When court verdict finally came, uncle was sent to 15 yrs imprisonment. My heart was broken. It would be better if my grandmother who promised to do her share broke her promise could have helped. To me, she’s such a liars and I hate liars. But seeing the pain in my dad’s eyes, I was grieved. How could someone hurt somebody so sincere and so nice from any others? How could they ever do that? How could a mother lie to her son and broke his heart when all along he had taken care of her, cherish her, loved her. And how could she do that when her son was one of her own. My head pounded with questions that no one can answer but god himself. But I have faith in god. Everything happens for a reason and I believe that someday he’ll show me the right path of life and lead me to happiness with my family and my uncle.
After seeing what a mother can do to hurt her son…I would never do that to my child. Or anyone. My dad has been a role model for me and I will always look up to him and be just like him. I will never betray him and I will take care of him all my life. Even if it is until the last breath I take. My father has been hurt so much and I wouldn’t want to hurt him anymore. I wouldn’t even let anyone hurt my dad again. EVER. |
a penny for my thoughts?
Thursday, November 11, 2004
Hey peeps! What;s ups! Isn't this a cool bloggie! I love this! I can't believe I actually managed to put a skin for this...this is great...don't worry ppl...I'll put more photos in here...so u can see more of pictures. I've just taken some pictures and I'll sent it here as soon as i can... So today i am going to write about my coming result. My god...I am so scared when the result will some. WHAT WILL HAPPENED TO ME IF I FAIL? Well I've talked to dad...and he said he'll let me retake the thing. but who wants to re take AGAIN? I want to pass...I am still so scared. What if all my buddies passed? And i am the only one who failed? I'll be so ashamed!!!! I think I am lost in thoughts just thinking about this. I need to stay positive, being nagative won't help, right? RIGHT! But i don't feel like being positive right now...I think I am going to sink!! Hmm....today and until i get my result, I will worry to death. Haiz... |
a penny for my thoughts?
Wednesday, November 10, 2004
| God! how long have i not been in here? Pretty long i guess...I am so glad everything turn out to be great for this blog. I've spoilt it and now I've redone it. Quite simple isn't it. Sweet. Oh come on guys, It's CANDY COLOURED! And...sorry...this blog has not alot in it....So it's still under maintanence. But it'll be done really soon...i just want to add a link and a tag board...at the mean time..I am going to write more entries in my new blog..so you guys go check it out! Alrighty! BYE! |
a penny for my thoughts?
Thursday, October 21, 2004
i am so bored!!! there's nothing to do right now.... now it's going be 2 am...my god...i should be asleep now...haiz..i wish i had money and i could watch movie...haiz...wish i was rich. so many thing i am wishing but i am grateful with whatever god's given me....i won't ask for more..but if he wants to give me something more....i wouldn't mind at all....god tomorrow got interview...what is an events promoter? i am going for that position.....haixz....plz let me some other job....i don't noe lah...i am feeling stressed actually.
a penny for my thoughts?
