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a penny for my thoughts?

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a penny for my thoughts?

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a penny for my thoughts?

Life sucks. That’s what comes to my pathetic brain every morning. I got up from my bed and sat on the side of my bed. Suddenly, my bedroom door burst opened as my mom march in and gave me a scolding early in the break of dawn. Now not only life sucks, it hurts as well. My mom never loved me. If she did, she wouldn’t blame me for every mistake that was going on in my house.
“Why are you like a pig!” my mom shouted at my face. It was more like a statement rather than a question. Is this the way a mother should talk to her daughter? Is this the right example a mother should show her daughter? I don’t think so. My heart sank as more of the familiar words came out from my mom’s own voice: you’re worst than a prostitute daughter! With the last statement she made, she went out and slams the door. Tears sting my eyes and finally it fell down my cheek. My heart was broken into pieces. By who? By a woman I called my mother.
Eating breakfast on the dining table was a pure agony. My mom would go talking. How different everyone is from me. My ears just eat the words silently while my heart slowly break, killing me. Finally, the time has for me to leave for school. I walk out of the house. No goodbyes from anyone...a continuation

a penny for my thoughts?

Earlier ago wherever I go
People will look at me
From head to toe
Like I don’t belong here
And nobody will shed a tear
It’s so weird living on mother earth
Especially people like me
Like we’re out of everything
And life is continuing
Like a hell, burning.

What do I lack?
I am human and so are you
Is it my back?
Or is it my face?
Am I not good enough for you?
Tell me
Which part of me
Do you hate?
People like you think I don’t deserve to live
Well trust me I don’t want to
Cause you think I’m on level one
And you’re on level two

This is so unfair
Tell me
Will we ever get there?
Where you and me
Can understand each other
Better
But you see this is only word
This is only a dream
People say dreams come true
But to me it will never do
Where is justice?
Has it rest in peace?
Oh god why are you doing this to me?
What have I done wrong anyway?
Please make my dream come true
I do want to live too
Happily, I mean
Not sad and torturing

a penny for my thoughts?

Now let’s not talk about friendship because it’s really making my head ache. Tonight I’m going to talk about a broken heart. By love. Why do people give up their in-shape heart and then ending up with a broken one when the love is over. They always say that first love never last…but my mom first love was my dad and how come they are still in love and all after 17 years of marriage. Love is a weird thing they say…..it can make you happy and it can crush you so far down that you wish you were dead….and then you think that you’re better off dead because nobody cares….when you know deep down plenty of love ones cared and would have made you better. But misery got the better of you. But that’s how people think when love bring them down or make them cry a river. But I got all this information is not from past experiences but from what I see all around me….people are crying because of love and some smile because of the same reasons. Others prefer to be alone and independent. So this is the advice I have for myself and will make my philosophy for love….if love end for me and I’m disappointed…. I’ll always cherish the good memories and then throw it away. I know a lot of you would say that it is easier said than done….but if a person force himself to let go…he will…slowly time healed….we just need to be patient. But let’s be in the shoe of the heart breaker…..but if you’re a player regardless of what gender you’re in….I’m just telling…might as well don’t read this…because you guys do not cherish at all…you only play the game. So don’t bother. I know it’s hard when you don’t feel the love from the other party. You tried not only once but a lot of time being in the other party shoes. You know they’ll get a broken heart and you care too much that you delay the break up. But as time went by, your love for him/her cannot be given because you just cannot feel the love from him/her. It makes no sense if you stay in the relationship….furthermore it is not fair for the other party. You stay awake all night thinking of nice words to end the relationship peacefully. What do you say when you meet him/her. Finally, tomorrow came like lighting. You met him/her. Your heart’s pounding. You’re afraid of hurting him/her. He/she smiles so bright but it didn’t capture your heart like it used to. You let go of the words…and now you wait….ok this is where suspension comes, right? You don’t want to feel guilty so you rather hear the words…yeah I was thinking about it too rather than I hate you…and he/she start crying. Some of you get away freely some don’t, so that’s the equal part of hurt or relief. If the other party accept the other party as a friend…both of you have loved and broken up and will forgive each other but still be friends and for the other…try to move on…it’s not that hard and there are still that someone out there. Love will never end in this world. If it does…the world would have end. Ok got to go.

a penny for my thoughts?

Man…seriously after having a good friend is great but when u loses him or her all of a sudden….it really hurts. Like mad it hurt so bad…that you get so insecure and you start to cry at night…hiding your tears from everyone….your heart burn of all the pain…and your eyes overflow with tears…two weeks passed and you still don’t hear from him….suddenly the phone rings and you pick up. You hear his voice saying sorry and all…you smile again. Now all your anger has washed away just after hearing his voice. He explained everything and you understand at that moment. 2 week passed again…he didn’t even called. Why? You asked. Couldn’t he just say hi or a hello? Is this what good friends are all about? You can’t hold the pain any longer…you dialed his number….hoping he’ll pick up….but he didn’t instead his maid pick it up…ask if he’s home…and he was….you hear his voice…your heart melt again…instead of being angry with him….you’re still glad that’s his alive and still sound happy to hear you voice…. Slowly time pass…you start to accept his busyness and all…and can’t use the phone….his birthday is coming...you brought him a small present….sent it….and he called….but slowly…the tight good friendship loosen up……SAD STORY? GUESS SO….CAUSE IT’S ME WHO IS GOING THROUGH THE PAIN….ONLY IF YOU READ THIS AND KNEW MY FRIEND…….

a penny for my thoughts?

Don’t come near me
I cannot hold this back
Can’t you see me?
Why is she standing in front?
And I’m standing at the back?
Why did you call me a friend?
When all you do is care for yourself?
This hurt I cannot mend
I’ve got to go, got to think for myself
You put me in a state
Where I cry all night long
You’re never there, mate
I feel alone all along
You never knew
How much I love you
You didn’t notice or care
Now I am so vulnerable, so bare
You never were strong
Always crying over her
I tried to make you strong
To make you forget her
But you still want to lay low
Think she’ll come back
Now I am the one who gone so low
I don’t think I want to be back
I think I should leave
It be good for you and me
I tried to believe
That eventually you’ll see me
But you never do
So now I am leaving
I won’t be there for you
Not anymore, cause now I’m going.

a penny for my thoughts?

Man! Today IS ANOTHER boring day!! what am i suppose to write in here. ok let's start with the like matters to me...Today there is no news about anything weird happening. Hmm maybe i am going to study maths and physics. MAYBE. But i should, shouldn't I? well i guess that is life for a freaking 16 yrs old that i am. Peple say live your life to the fullest especially when you're sixteen. But what if there is nothing to live for? well anyway i've got a ne theory for myself...or a question for myself. How do we spell LIFE? Well, it's spelled like this; B-O-R-I-N-G!!! Ok, let's say that you're befriending a person you do not like so much but that person keep bugging you...so what do you do? Would you tell the person frankly about what you're feeling or you just endure it? As for me...I'll tell them straight to their face...because a friedship is not about hating in silence...

a penny for my thoughts?